Sam is one.

On 3.9.12 Sam turned one. Wow. Sometimes I think someone used a zapper, time machine thing on me while I was sleeping to fast forward a year. How else can we explain how this year went by so fast? One minute you find out you're pregnant, the next, you have a squishy, stranger baby in your arms... and POOF! He's a year old.

So what have I learned so far being a parent of a one year old? Well, too many to write. But I have a few lessons that should be jotted down for the future... because I know I'll forget.

1. Don't sweat the small stuff. So I admit to you, this is a really broad category. How do you know how to classify something as "small"? Well, only you can be the judge of that, but I've learned that you will never be able to control all factors in the situation, but it's good to be reminded that life is messy. That's what makes it beautiful and allows you to grow in ways you didn't know possible.

2. Go with your gut. After a year of taking care of Sam, I've realized as a mother you have to go with your intuition. There have many times where I felt like I should do something, but couldn't, wouldn't, or felt I shouldn't. But out of those times, it seemed that doing that very thing I initially wanted to do would have been best for him.

3. Protect time with your spouse. Now this is a touchy one. I'll be the first one to admit that I've failed at this one many times. And will probably continue to in the future. I've found in our relationship (and most for that matter) that it's crucial to have protected time without any interruptions. Interruptions being a baby around. :) Now this may mean you need to get creative with your schedules. I know with the husband busy in seminary, we've definitely had to get creative. Maybe it's an at home date night after the baby is in bed. Either way, it's important to keep your relationship in tune, and in return, this will allow you to be great parents because you're working on a stable foundation for your children.

4. Document it. So if you've seen my Facebook, you'll know that I have no problem in this area. My motto is I'd rather have too much than too little. Photos and video are both great ways to keep track of your baby's growth and milestones. Try journaling about what you're experiencing or what he/she is currently doing. It not only can relieve stress that you may be experiencing, but it will be a nice momento. I need to work on journaling.

5. And most of all, enjoy your baby! Whatever difficulty or trial you may be facing as a parent will never be as important as enjoying and loving your baby. Thanks to my husband for reminding me this important lesson this last year, I've learned that it's always about perspective. We choose what light to view our lives in. Enjoying your baby (over anxiety) is what God intended us to do.

Here are just a few things I've learned over the past year. Feel free to add any more tips. I'd love to learn from you!

Sleepless in Dallas Part 2

When I wrote Sleepless In Dallas, I was a new mama. It's funny to think back on those nights when you run into the room every 10 minutes to make sure your baby is breathing. Oh wait, we still do that. :) My, my does life change when you have a baby. And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

The other night, Sam woke up around 4:15 am. Poor guy is teething 4 molars. Ouch. So after a few attempts to rock him back to sleep -- which consisted of these steps:

1. Rock him

2. Lay him down

3. Tuck myself in bed

4. Hear him cry

5. Repeat

--I decided to get up with him. I opened the blinds in our living area, and we both quietly gazed out at the sleepy city's beautiful lights. He was in awe. He first looked at me, pointed to the lights through the window, then start whispering his jibber jabber. He did this over and over with his contagious smile.

So much joy flooded my heart watching my boy while he enjoyed the view. I thanked the Lord for giving me this time with Sam because most nights, I don't know my right hand from my left. True story.

What a surreal moment I had watching Sam to think that my baby is no longer a little baby (And how many times have I heard mothers or fathers say that?! But it's so true!).

It was a special moment between us that I will always remember. After a few minutes together, I laid him back down and he soon fell asleep. I, on the other hand, was so overwhelmed with how blessed I truly am. Both of my boys are such a gift to me.

It also made me think of the final scene from the movie, Nine Months starring Hugh Grant and Julianne Moore. This isn't the best video quality of this scene. It's in a foreign language. But the song, These Are The Days By Van Morrison was the couple's song. Hugh's character plays it for their new son to lull him back to sleep.

Call me corny, but I think it is pretty sweet. Here it is.

Sam the Lion

Sam the Lion. It has such a nice ring to it, doesn't it? This is Sam's first Halloween! Something special about Samuel being a lion was that Tony was a lion his very first Halloween.

Well, let me honest with you. It wasn't until yesterday that I decided he should be a lion. Yesterday. You know, the day before Halloween. Hmmm. I don't know why, but the thought didn't really cross my mind that I should dress up my adorable baby boy as a cute, fuzzy, something-rather until yesterday. Shame on me.

Most excited, chipper, or gung-ho (I always saw myself as one of these) mothers plan what they're sweet baby will be for Halloween when they find out they're pregnant. If not by then, when they're baby is born. I'm sort of joking when I say this. Sort of. But before you knew it, BAM! He's eight months old, and I hadn't given it much thought. I guess the thought stressed me out...? That sounds lame.

It wasn't until yesterday when I told Tony I wanted to dress Samuel up as a cute, fuzzy something-rather. I frantically got on the internet and started searching baby halloween costumes to purchase. Most were on sale since it was so last minute. Tony just stood behind me and said flippantly, "My mom made my costumes."

At first...I won't lie to you. I was a teeny bit offended. So what (No offense, Mom)? The thought of making a costume stresses me out, okay? And we're talking less than a day away, sir. But then, a light bulb went off! Wait a sec. Hold everything. I know how to make things. Crocheted things. I can crochet his costume. Then I got a very large dose of adrenaline, and started feeling awfully creative/crafty without warning.

Yes, I can do this!

So without delay, I started crocheting. And did not stop until I the head piece, tail, and paws for the feet. I had it completed last night. Ahhh. Victory!

Though my hand is a little cramped today, it was oh so worth it to see my little guy look this adorable. And sure the outfit makes him look even cuter.

Lil' Bow Wow and Sam the Lion

Being Samuel's mama

Everyone tells you that your life will change drastically when you have a baby. You know it's true; you even try to brace yourself. But you can never really prepare yourself for that day until it really happens.

Like most little girls, I dreamed of what it would be like to be a mother. I played house, played with baby dolls, and cooed over babies. I would often cradle a baby in my arms and wonder what it would be like to one day cradle my baby.

And then it happened. Samuel was born, and I held him for the first time. There are no combinations of words to fully describe what holding my son for the first time was like. But if I dare try, it was like my heart overflowed (or even exploded) with joy, love, and awe.

My son was finally here. Little did he know that he was wept over, prayed fervently for, rejoiced over, feared over, and patiently waited for. All he knew was that God made me his mama.

Seven months have passed. I didn't know that it was possible to have this much love for this little guy, but it mysteriously grows with each passing day. The best part about this journey of mamahood is that my love for my husband and God grows exponentially as well.

I am humbled and so thankful that the Lord has allowed me to be Samuel's mama. I wouldn't want it any other way. I would endure it all again for you, my son. All of the anticipation, heartache, loss, pregnancy sickness, stretch marks, weight gain; it was all well worth it and more.

I love you, Samuel.

Has it really been almost 4 months?!

He's here! And what can I say? Our lives are so different today than the first post. We laugh more, we (I) probably cry more, and we have never had so much love for one tiny, little person. And... we are rejoicing heavily in God's goodness to us!

Samuel Ray Howard was born at 6:45 am on March 9, 2011- Ash Wednesday. He weighed 6 pounds, 9 ounces. He was two weeks early, and boy did he come as a surprise to his mama and papa.

So here's my labor story:

I had a five hour labor from start to finish. My water broke while I was sleeping at 1:40 and the contractions came afterwards. The contractions started up pretty quickly and were very strong. I had to call my midwives a couple of times because they were pretty intense, but they kept assuring me that I was still in the first stages of labor, and that I needed to go to bed. I kept telling Tony that I felt I wasn't in first stages of labor, but even farther. But by the time 5:00 am rolled around, my contractions were 2 to 1.5 min apart. Once we got to the car, I felt the urge to push. When we got the birthing center at 6:00 am, I was dilated to a 9.5. I got in the tub for the last 30 min and he was born at 6:45 am.

It was a whirlwind of an experience, but am so thankful for it. I learned the importance of listening to your body and letting it do what it wants to do.

It's funny how it seems so long ago. Everyone says it, but it's true. It goes by so fast. I've spent the last four months soaking up this sweet baby boy. More to come later. And... I will get better at posting more often. :)

Love,

The Meltons

"God heard"

God heard us.

We now have a healthy baby boy on the way. We feel so incredibly loved by our Father that He indeed answered our prayers. The countdown is still going, but the days are fewer and fewer. We often talk about what he will look like, what our small apartment will be like with another body in the room, what his laugh sounds like...I hope that he has his father's beautiful green eyes, compassionate heart, and ability to make people laugh. There is so much hope in this little one.

We are anxiously awaiting your arrival, sweet boy.